My son and older daughter are 21 months apart. When I was pregnant with Ansley I had all the second time mommy fears about if I could love a second child as much as my first and if Matt would be jealous. All those fears slipped away so naturally and quickly once Ansley was born. They were fast friends! Ansley was constantly trying to catch up. I pegged the wrong one for jealous. If I gave Matt any attention she would have to come along and bust it up. Other then that, they played perfect...until...
I guess it was about 4 years ago when they started deciding they didn't like each other anymore. It has gradually escalated, to the hell we are in now. See the problem is that both of them think they are the boss. Each tries to boos the other, and it just aint working. These children could not be anymore opposite then they are. Ansley likes to read and watch TV. Matt like video games and music. They just do not have the same interest. The problem come in when one tries to make the other do what they are interested in. All hell breaks out. This along with just general bossing each other around makes my house sound like total looneiness.
There is a standing rule in my house. If you are reading this and your children are still in their honeymoon phase where they skip and play and want to be together all the time, listen up. Do not, under no circumstances get sucked into kid fights. They are stupid fights and there is never a right or wrong, never. I wasted a lot of energy on kid fights until I realized they were doing it to drive me nuts! The only time I get involved is if there is blood, or they are going to mess up my house.If they involve me both get in trouble. The one who did whatever for being ugly and the other child for tattling. See, the tattler is normally guilty of being ugly also, they just think they can get out of it by telling. Most altercations between my kids are not physical...oh hell no that would be way too easy. Just beat the shit outta each other and get it over with! If I hear hitting I will separate them, but I don't wanta know nuttin about nuttin that started it!
It took my husband awhile to get on my train of thought. He tried to reason with them, and teach them to work it out. Pfffttt. They are brother and sister! It is inbred in them to fight. You can not reason with unreasonable people, so don't waste your time. I am glad to say that he has caught on and is a much happier person! LOL
This brings me to today. They spent the weekend with DA. Every time they come back they are grumpy. I don't know who, or what sparked the fight but they decided to have this battle of (stupid) word at dinner. Sigh. I really do try to understand, but it is on a different level. My brain does not go there. Anyway, I tried to talk around it, tell em to shut up and finally separate them. I told them if they did not shut up I was going to make them hug for 10 minutes. Muuuhahhahha That lasted for about 3 minutes and here came Matt. Ok fine, I let him speak...tell me all the evils Ansley has ever done. Then I let her speak. Same song and dance. Basically, Matt sucks. Then they started back up again. So I told them that they were not allowed to speak to each other for a week. (Mouths flew open) What?? I said if the two of you can not be kind and respect each other you should not talk and I am putting yall on talking restriction. No talking to each other until Friday after school. (Another look like I have 3 heads and a 4th is growing while I spoke).
Matt: We are not that mean to each other.
Ansley: What if I break my arm?
Me: Just tell him to call me you broke your arm.
Ansley (tears wellin in her beautiful brown eyes) So all I can say is I broke my arm, I love you, call mama.
Me: no you can just tell him you broke your arm and to call me.
You would have swore I licked the red off their candy. Man, that damned ole mama threw them a curve ball. Anyway, they are not on talking restriction. I just told them they need to be nice and respectful or they would be. That's not cool to them. See they are brother and sister...and best friends.