I have been cruising the mommy blog directories, so I felt like I should put up a disclaimer for the new folks.


Yep! I am all of the above, with a little bit of nice rolled in for good measure (although I don’t show that often). I started this blog just wanting to shoot the shit…yes I do use potty words, they make me feel grown up (kinda)…and after 2 + months I have decided that is what I want to keep on doing. I love give away moms and PR moms rock…that is just not what I started this site for. The only thing I might give away is a small piece of my brain (I can’t afford a big piece, I would have nada left). I will dance for comments and I love followers, not just for the sake of following. If you like who I am and what I do- Follow me Bitches. If not, that is cool.

I am a non baby wearing, put your ass in a crib, drink from a bottle and a spanking you deserve is a spaning you will get mama. I DO NOT care how you raise your kid. If you want to breast feed until Junior High…that’s cool (I am gonna talk about your ass, but that is cool). No seriously, everyone parents in different ways. I parent the way I was parented and the way that 99% of the people I know were parented. I am from the south, so we tend to not be as “green” (unless you are talking about collards, I am all over that) as other regions. That does not mean I don’t respect others ways of parenting. I just ask that you respect mine.

I guess I should say when I talk about my awesomeness I am also being silly. I don’t think I am truly a Queen, or totally awesome…I have a few flaws…..just a few! ;o)




Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Ansley Says

Those that know my oldest daughter would prolly describe her as colorful and unexpected. She was born with what my grandmother called an "old soul". She was grown from the first breath she took.
Over the years I have accumulated numerous Ansley stories. Every so often I will share these stories in "Ansley Says". These are posts that you really don't want to miss!

Todays story takes me back to Christmas 2006. Dean and I were married earlier that year so this was our first official Christmas as a family. Dean's parents live in a retirement village in Arkansas. Dean had lived in this area for a few years prior to moving to SC, so he has a heap of friends there. The opportunity opened up that we would be able to travel to AR to spend some time with his parents and friends the week prior to Christmas. This was super exciting for all of us! The kids were jacked because this would be their first plane trip!
I was so super nervous. You have to remember, Dean moved to my world so I had only met his parents a few times and only briefly meet some of his LA family and friends at our wedding. So this was a big deal for me! I wanted them to like me and the kiddies lots! I prepared for weeks. Picking outfits and prepping the kids. At night I would go to bed whining about how I wanted to go, but I didn't want to go. I really was excited, just super nervous. Contrary to popular belief, I HATE to be the center of attention.
During this same time period my gypsy friends (yes real gypsies, and I have a blog planned to tell you about them in detail that you will not want to miss) introduced me to clip on hair. Older people call them "falls". Now you have to remember I am super self conscious. I am very consertive. I wish I could just do what I like, but unfortunately (maybe because I talk about peoples poor fashion decisions) I am not a risk taker. However, after admiring one gypsies hair piece I was intrigued. I decided to give it a try.

The day of our trip came. I decided that we were going to be traveling all day and I wanted to look fabo for my very first meeting with all of this very important people in my husbands life, to wear the piece. Sigh. So I did. It did look fabo. I was happy! Until...

Dean's parents own a restruant in the retirement village. Anyone and everyone knew we were arriving that day and made it a point to be at the restruant around the time we were to arrive. The closer we got the bigger the knot in my stomach became. Dean and I reminded the kids (6 and 8 at the time) to use their manners (yes ma'am, no ma'am...all that junk). Standard instruction before going into any situation. They were bouncing in the car in anticipation of the adventure that was ahead.

We arrived at the restaurant and went in the back way so Dean could see the employees first. This meeting was just a brief exchange b/c they were all busy working. So then we walk through the swinging door to a waiting room. As we walking in (me bringin up the rear b/c I have learned that the kids deflect attention if you send them in first) there were at least 10 waiting couples. As soon as the little ones walked in they were surrounded by grandmothers. Good! My plan was working!! Ansley ran up to a grandmother and offered a great big hug. I am sure that this surprised the woman that my children were so openly loving with people they had never met. After the hug (Ansley had not even spoke at this point, she just came in and hugged) she push her head back to look at the woman in the face (while her arms were still clasped around the womans waist) and said "MY MAMA HAS FAKE HAIR". OMFG!

To say I wanted to crawl under the table was an understatement. I can't blame the child. She was playing the same game I was, deflecting the attention. I also did not specifically tell her not to tell anyone about my fake hair. Mommies listen up! Be specific. Take nothing for granted. If you do your children will out you also!

I have since taught my daughter what to say and not say, so now she saves all her littlw tween quips for family time. I look forward to sharing them with all of you!



  1. If you want to know any family secrets at our house, just ask the kids.

  2. Seriously. You can't do anything around kids because they are super quick to call you out. LOL I've learned that the humiliating way :)

  3. lol! Yea my daughter almost got me in deep with hubby, emily was talking with her friend and she said "yea so my moms got a new boyfriend, she's totally in love with him..." jeremy runs in all wtf? who? what? lol (She was talking about twilight HAHAHA)

  4. Hilarious! Sounds like something Nino would do to me. He loves to out me on anythign I might be embarasseda about. Hahahahahaha!!! Good post!!!!